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I never knew I wanted a baby with Down Syndrome until I had one.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Living in Denial
Did you ever go through a phase where you felt like you were living in denial?
Well, I think the reality of this phase hit me today.
Today Grace finally, had her baptism. Well as I got her dressed and snapped all these cute pictures of her..common on...face it...she's got that cuteness. Well as we are at the church and I see 3 other kids her age that are being baptized as well...reality sets in...Grace is different from these other kids. Other than Grace being a fat plump compared to these other kids, I notice other difference. She is not holding her body frame up as well. Her eyes are shaped a little different. Her nose is a little flatter than the others. Something about that smile, beautiful, but different. What am I seeing? Am I really seeing Down Syndrome for the first time? Or is it that I am around other kids her age that DO NOT have Down Syndrome and I notice it even more. And as much as I love every inch of this baby girl I look at her and think, does everyone else see... what I see? So just as I thought I had permanently closed the flood gates, I shed some tears tonight for my baby girl. Not because I love her any less, but because I see the difference. And if I see the difference, that means everyone else sees the difference, and unfortunately everyone else won't have this strong love for her that I have.
Despite mommy's moment of sadness on the day, Grace still managed to be the Princess that she is.
My Beautiful Down Syndrome Princess!
Grace, her mommy and daddy, and godparents (Nanny and Parean)
Sunday, August 8, 2010
A Busy Month
Today, Gracie is five months old. I can't believe it, time has really passed, but when you are blissfully happy time just seems to zoom by. Grace still seems to amaze her physical therapist and doctors by doing such a wonderful job. There are times when I look at our neighbors kid who is the same age as her, and I notice that she is a little bit wobblier than he is, and she is not sitting up...a pinch of sadness starts settling in, but then, she smiles that big beautiful smile and I forget about everything she is not doing and brag about all that she is doing.
Gracie was blessed to have a photographer come across my blog and donate her services. She read my blog and saw Grace's pictures and offered to take a few pictures of her to add to her gallery. This was a big reminder to me that there are still good people out there that want to help others. There is no way I would have been able to afford her services on a one income household. But I guess Angels are still watching over us, and have decided to bless us with some of the little luxuries we could have done with out.
Now other than snapping photos, mommy has had a lot of other things on her plate. I have discovered that we are definitely a football family. My oldest son has started playing little league football, and I just love every bit of it. I love it so much I have volunteered to be the team mom, and despite everyone telling me how horrible being the team mom is...I love being a part of my sons team. I am sure as the season starts I will have to add a little Evan bragging into my blog.
Well, as if I wasn't busy enough...I have also started a local community group for our Down Syndrome Association of Houston. Houston is a very big city and living on one of the suburban areas of town it would take almost an hour to get to our local meeting area. But I luckily will not have to do that anymore. I have worked with a few other moms in the area, and the president of our DSAH and we now have our own Pearland Community Group, and I am so proud to say I am the group leader. I have been very busy pulling this all together, but it will be so worth it in the end. It's funny I quit my job, and found what I was meant to be in life. A mom, and involved with the community. I am sooo loving this.
So now that I tell you what all I HAVE been doing, since posting to my blog has not been one of them, I am making this promise to post once a week...who am I making the promise to, myself!
Thank you so much Tonya for taking pictures of my baby.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Sunday, July 4, 2010
It's been one year, today, since I found out I was pregnant with baby number three. So many things started going through my mind. Can we afford another baby? Can I mentally handle another baby? I thought we were done. I didn't want another baby. How would I handle another baby? I was working crazy hours at a very demanding jobs, I just didn't see myself having the time for another baby. All the doubts of if we were going to be able to handle this haunted me on a constant basis.
About a month into my pregnancy I started having this strange feeling. The feeling that I was going to miscarry. I just had this feeling that I would NOT be able to handle three kids, and God doesn't give you what you can't handle, so I just had this feeling that something was going to happen and I was not going to go full term with this baby. Every day I tried to imagine how I was going to be able to handle what was in store for me in 9 months...
Then that's when the news came. I found out that Grace had a little something extra. As a matter of fact, at that point her name was going to be Lily, or Olivia even. But once I found out that I was having a girl, and that she was going to have Down Syndrome, I knew I was meant to have this baby.
A year ago, I would have never thought I would have an unimaginable love in my life. Grace! A little blessing she definitely is.
Friday, July 2, 2010
Thursday, June 24, 2010
A Tribute to the Sisterhood
I noticed today that I have over 150 friends on my facebook account that are my Sisters of the Extra Chromosome. Whether I met you through BabyCenter, or came across you on Facebook, God has really blessed me with this new found family that I have. I have learned more about your kids, and feel like I know them as any Aunt would know her nieces and nephews.
I am there to cheer on as Sara has her first taste of baby food, or Isla as she sits up like a big girl at the restaurant, or Violette as she conquers the potty, and Joy as she moves to the big crib.
I am there to congratulate Olivia on her 2nd Birthday, Kate on her 3rd or Gabriel and Kai as they become big brothers.
I am there to pray for Shane and Wyatt (who have been so strong), Jonathan (who approaches surgery next week), and Lucy (who has finally made it home)!
I am there to admire the photo shoots of Miss Elizabeth, the captivating smile of Ethan, the "wish I had" hair of Wyatt, and the beauty of Solana.
And this only speaks of a few. I could name them all Grady, Chloe, Micah, Castian, Sebastian, Vincent, Taylor, Lila, Sam, Molly and Claire....the list could go on and on.
I have grown to know these kids and their families. I have also grown to love and care for these little ones and their families, just as I would any niece or nephew. Just as I know so many have grown to love my little Grace. Some may not understand how you can have this bond with women you have never met, but ask any other mom in the Sisterhood of the Extra Chromosome, they feel the connection as well.
If only there was a way every time a family received the diagnosis, instead of someone telling them "I'm Sorry" there was someone there that could tell them, "oh how lucky!! you just gained an amazing family!"
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